Corey of Corey's Cauldron took your questions and we just had a little chat about it.
2 Years of Your Average Witch! AMA hosted by Corey's Cauldron
Corey: Um, we're going to start off real strong. What are your long term plans or hopes for the podcast?
Kim: Oh, so there's no introduction?
Corey: Oh, no introduction. Wait, what are we doing introduction wise? What are we doing with the introduction?
Kim: (laughing) At least telling people what's going on?
Corey: (laughing) Oh, hey! No, we go. It's a cold cut. We're going straight to it. I'm investigative reporter Corey of Corey's Cauldron. I'm here today with Your Average Witch podcast, Kim. Hi, Kim. Are you ready for all these really intense questions?
Kim: Are they intense?
Corey: No, they're not really intense.
Kim: I have only, I don't even know what they are, folks, so it's going to be exciting. Usually my guests get the questions in advance, but I decided not to do that for entertainment value.
Corey: And some of these are going to put you a little bit on the spot, which is going to be fun.
Kim: Oh no.
Corey: Yeah. Not in a bad way. Like there are some fun ones and then there are like some more in-depth ones. But I'm super excited. So to explain what's going on today. It is the pod birth. Yayyyyy!
Kim: It's the podbirth! Actually, this is going out in July. So last week was the pod birth.
Corey: Oh, yay!
Kim: Actually, today is WBAH's birthday. Today as we were recording. It's WBAH's birthday and I forgot to wish them... phone time. Let's wish them happy birthday right now.
Corey: Are you doing it on like the Facebook group or just messaging them?
Kim: I'm just texting. I don't have the patience to go through all that crap.
Corey: I don't have their phone number. I don't care. I pester them on Facebook Messenger all the time.
Kim: Okay, I accidentally typed hair pod birth so that's what Charlye gets. That's what she gets for giving you COVID. (both laugh)
Corey: She was the first one I messaged. I was like, so I can't taste or smell anything. She was like, no! So we are doing this episode as a recognition of Your Average Witch pod birth. Horn horn horn!
Kim: Two years.
Corey: Two years, which is wild.
Kim: Mhmm! It's really weird.
Corey: It is. Corey's Cauldron will be a year old in a couple of months. That's going to be strange. I don't know what I'm going to do.
Kim: Is it a Sagittarius?
Corey: Uh, August, so...
Kim: Leo.
Corey: Leo. Not Leo.
Kim: Is it not? Because that seems fitting.
Corey: (laughing) One, rude. How dare you?
Kim: (laughing) I love you!
Corey: What is August? We're bad witches. Look at us.
Kim: I thought it was... I swear, isn't that when Charlye's birthday is?
Corey: I thought Leo was... Watch is gonna be... it's gonna be. It's gonna be Leo. And I'm gonna be like, oh no, I just totally... I totally gaslit you! (both laugh)
Kim: It worked. I was like, I don't know anything about astrology.
Corey: I was convinced it was Virgo, which honestly, Corey's Cauldron might be a Cusp baby. I don't know, I'll have to double check.
Kim: That'd be interesting. I don't know crap about Virgo, except that Jenna Marbles is one.
Corey: Oh, that's a really high standard. Please don't have that standard for me.
Kim: Too late.
Corey: Oh no! (laughs)
Kim: Oh god, now everybody's going to see how many times I fucking compulsively put on lip balm.
Corey: Is that the one that you made though? Is that the one that dried out?
Kim: No.
Corey: Oh damn.
Kim: This is the one from my hip surgery. I was like, can you please bring me some lip balm after the surgery? And I was like, barely conscious.
Corey: So introduction. We are doing this episode. We've flipped the script a little bit. And I am interviewing Kim with questions that listeners have asked. And so Kim has no idea what the questions are.
Kim: So I hate that.
Corey: I know and you volunteered for that so that's the best part too.
Kim: I know.
Corey: I was like do you want these questions and you said no which seems cruel to do to yourself. All right are you ready for the first question?
Kim: Okay.
Corey: I mean you already heard it because I already told you.
Kim: Yeah but no I didn't because my brain was not listening to you.
Corey: Like, this is not what we're supposed to be doing. (both laugh)
Kim: Yeah.
Corey: So, the first question is, what are your long-term plans and hopes for the podcast?
Kim: Happily, I just finished a business class where I had to develop that anyway, so. Perfect. Was this Melisa? (Laughs)
Corey: This is actually a question that came up a couple of times.
Kim: So my long-term goal is to be doing this as my job. It will be the major part of my new subscription service. It's not really a service. I don't know what to call it, but my new subscription platform that I am going to build to leave Patreon, maybe leave Facebook, I know a lot of people- it's convenient, so. It will be another option for Patreon. And so it's going to keep going, I'm going to keep doing it, I'm going to, new witches are born every day. There are so many witches that I haven't even thought about meeting yet. So as long as there's witches, this podcast exists and I'm going to keep doing it.
Corey: Yeah. Very cool. And authors are coming out of the woodwork, it feels like.
Kim: Oh my gosh. Yeah. Because I now have a wonderful contact named Markus through Llewellyn Oh, another thing I plan on doing is traveling. I want to do on location. And in fact, I will be recording a live podcast at Anahata's this year.
Corey: Yay. That's exciting!
Kim: So there's the answer to that question, I think.
Corey: Yeah, very cool.
Kim: If I don't answer it well, then tell me.
Corey: I will, don't worry. (both laugh)
Kim: Okay.
Corey: We're just like, meh, no.
Kim: "You didn't answer the question at all. You just veered off about McDonald's."
Corey: "So, anyways, back to the question..."
Kim: Yes, do that.
Corey: What's something about your world view that's changed or is changing due to witchcraft?
Kim: My world view? I don't know what that means.
Corey: So, like, how you view or interact with the world around you. Some people can take it kind of like in a way of...
Kim: My whole world view...
Corey: Yeah, like how you actually interact with the world around you.
Kim: It's a little bit smaller.
Corey: That's interesting.
Kim: Because I talk to, I mean, one of my season one interviews was with someone from South Africa! I don't know anybody in South Africa! But it turns out that my best friend, Anne, her brother's girlfriend, was interested in being on the show. If you remember Aeiden Swan, The tarot artist, she's the one I'm talking about. So it's smaller. I don't really think about the world because I think very local to me. Because if I think about the world I'll have a panic attack, and (laughs) I can't function.
Corey: So what about the way that you navigate your life is because of witchcraft? I think that's the root of this question.
Kim: Okay, witchcraft-wise. I just, I have so many different ways of looking at things. Like just the one that I released yesterday, Marshall, the Witch of Southern Light. He assigned his own correspondences to the cardinal directions, which blew my mind. And he says east first, which what? It's always north, south, east, west, like the oh, because of... oh my god, that's Christianity creeping back into my mindset!
Corey: (laughs) I thought that I thought you knew that part!
Kim: I may have and then it went away.
Corey: (laughs) New discoveries every day.
Kim: Anyway, just the fact, yeah, basically that's the answer. There are so many new things, because almost every show I think, holy shit, now I'm going to have to look at things differently. So many things. The cardinal directions. The fact that I can interact with a plant as a being and not as a tool.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: I can't remember anything else.
Corey: No, yeah. And I think that's something that's really cool about the podcast too, and I'm gonna gush on you because it's your birthday.
Kim: (happily) Okay.
Corey: Is that there's always like, people may talk about things that seem average to them, because they're just so used to doing it. But in talking about the things that they're used to doing, it exposes people to different ways of thinking.
Kim: You join me.
Corey: Well, you, yes, but also like what you're not hearing is the listener side of things where it's like, holy crap, that's actually, like, that's a better way of doing it. Or I never thought about doing it that way. Or like, even I respect it. That's not my bag, though. You go girl, you do it. And so I think that's one of my, one of my favorite things about Your Average Witch.
Kim: Oh, yay. Keep doing that. Keep telling me things that are good about me.
Corey: (laughs) Tell me all of those things.
Kim: It's my birthday.
Corey: It is your birthday. What's the most challenging part of your spiritual practice?
Kim: ...Believing it exists?
Corey: Fair, yeah.
Kim: Okay, you see I'm wearing the science witch shirt. That's not... Didn't know that question was going to come up, but that's it. Mundane over magic. Mundane before magic. But then being able to take the step past mundane into magic is really hard for me because... Am I full of shit? Is everyone full of shit? I don't know. They're full of shit about a lot of things and so am I. Is this one of them? And then I have to just wade through that and decide, well, maybe, but let's take a chance, just like when I... (laughs) I'm probably going to ask Jason Miller to be on this podcast and I'm really afraid, but all he's going to do is say no.
Corey: You don't know that.
Kim: I might as well go for it.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: I mean, yeah, that's what I mean. I mean, that's like the worst.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: He's probably not going to say no, you pathetic little peon idiot. Which is what I'm anticipating. But he's probably not going to say it. So pushing past all of the you're a fake, you don't know how to do anything. What is that called?
Corey: Intrusive thoughts?
Kim: Imposter syndrome.
Corey: Imposter syndrome.
Kim: That's the hardest part.
Corey: And then there was a follow up question to this one. What makes it worth it to keep doing it?
Kim: Results. I get results. I get what I want. I am protected. I am monetarily compensated. I am safe. I'm in a house that I wanted forever. I always wanted some place that I could get as many dogs as I wanted and light things on fire in the yard if I wanted to. And I can. And soon as we get the bamboo growing, I'll be able to wander around the yard naked and all my dreams will come true.
Corey: You can also leave candles burning for a lot longer than you intended to.
Kim: How safe is that. (both laugh)
Corey: Your house hasn't burned down, that's all that matters. Knock on wood.
Kim: Thanks for cursing me, I love it.
Corey: I knocked on wood, it works in Appalachia all the time. What was something unexpected that came to you or happened because of the show?
Kim: Meeting so many people, having people interested in what I have to say, that's like the most alarming and surprising thing.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: That's really weird.
Corey: You've met a lot of people.
Kim: I've gotten to talk to so many fancy people.
Corey: (laughs) Right. And I know deep down you're like, "I'm just a person in Arizona just... at a mic.
Kim: Mhmmm. I'm just this dumbass in my closet.
Corey: (laughs) It's really cool to see... This is me, like doting on you again. It's really cool to see kind of the evolution, and if I may share a story which is super fun...
Kim: I love stories.
Corey: So Kim is aware of this story, the listeners are not, though. I have a friend local to me. And we started hanging out. He knew that I was part of Corey's Cauldron and that I listened to podcasts and stuff like that. And in kind of a moment of like, ooh, let me show you this podcast I listened to. He pulled up Your Average Witch and showed me Your Average Witch. And it was simultaneously like one of the cutest things, and also one of kind of like the most humbling things, too. Because I was like, Oh, well I've been on that podcast a couple times, and also I know Kim. And he was like Oh my gosh, what? And then like, we doted for a second. And that was really cool. Like even like these little like connections that you make with listeners is really cool. And it's amazing to see the reach that your voice is getting and how far your podcast is going. So be proud.
Kim: I... Okay? (laughs) That makes me feel funny. (both laugh)
Corey: Do you think that doing this podcast has changed you at all? And if so, how?
Kim: (deep inhale) So much. I'm more willing to... Okay. I say more willing, but I used to jump out of planes as part of my job. But I am more willing, I've returned to that adventurousness that made me join the Army because I couldn't find anybody else to go skydiving with me. I've returned to that adventurousness with this because I'm gonna ask Jason Miller to be on my podcast because what's he gonna do, say no? Who cares.
Corey: Right?
Kim: I'll move on. And I am pushing myself to learn more things, like how to edit this video. (both laugh) I'm willing to travel by myself, which is a big deal. I'm just so much more willing to try things that I haven't tried before because I want this podcast to be successful. So it's really pushing me to push past my self-imposed limits.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: And I'm thankful for that. I also want to learn more, because everybody comes on here talking about so many cool things, and they've been so many neat places, and they've done so many interesting things, and I want to learn more about that, and I want to go there and do those things.
Corey: Right. Can we go to Wales?
Kim: Sohanks everybody. Huh?
Corey: Can we go to Wales?
Kim: Fuck yes! Yes, absolutely.
Corey: I want to meet Mhara Starling.
Kim: Yeah, me too. I want Mhara Starling to be on my show.
Corey: (whispers) Mhara Starling, come on the show!
Kim: Everyone listening help me manifest this. (Corey laughs) If you know Mhara Starling, please have them email me. Or respond to the email that I sent them.
Corey: This is going to be a series of questions.
Kim: Oh lord.
Corey: And they're kind of just like, what's your favorite thing about, insert thing here.
Kim: Okay.
Corey: So what is your favorite thing about the pagan or witchy community of podcasts.
Kim: Oh, of podcasts...
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: Getting to learn about pagan and witchy shit. Getting to hear people talk about it, feeling comfortable because these are my people, instead of... Like the other podcasts that I listen to regularly that is not witchy is Ear Biscuits. And they are kind of obnoxious about how they look at the witch community, to be honest.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: So it's nice to feel accepted and feel valid.
Corey: Right.
Kim: So that's my favorite thing.
Corey: So is there a podcast, other than Your Average Witch, because we're here right now. Hi, how are you?
Kim: Oh hey.
Corey: Is tehre a podcast that kind of sticks out in your mind that kind of offers that regularly? I'm also going to remove WBAH from the table.
Kim: Oh, damn it! (both laugh) How dare you.
Corey: We've already mentioned those two.
Kim: I really enjoy Coffee and Cauldrons.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: I think they are hilarious together. I really love Abracadingdong, but I don't consider that to be witchy. But I, they are very funny and I like the way they cover things. I like the way they talk about things.
Corey: Yeah. So...
Kim: But also, sorry, but also it's like tied with New World Witchery because they're just so great.
Corey: Cory and Laine are so nice.
Kim: Yes.
Corey: Not to say that the folks over at Coffee and Cauldrens are not nice. What is your favorite thing about your practice?
Kim: (hesitates) I don't know. Oh, no. What?
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: My favorite thing about my practice? That's like my favorite... I don't know!
Corey: What's my favorite child? Which cat is your favorite cat?
Kim: Eggy. Instantly I know that. (Corey laughs) No contest. Eggy, a.k.a. Sardine, by the way, her name changes periodically. About my practice... I guess I don't really need a lot of things to do it, other than my... my lungs? To really, I can do what I need to do with just my body.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: I like having other stuff, but I do most of my work in the car with my lungs.
Corey: Hey, fucker, get out of my house. (both laugh) So something that I don't know that you've ever talked about on the podcast before, this is a Corey question. You had mentioned kind of like going into nature and finding like magical items or items to use in your witchcraft.
Kim: Oh, foraging.
Corey: Foraging, that's the word, yes. I couldn't find the word foraging.
Kim: Okay.
Corey: I was... scavenging was the word I could find. (laughs)
Kim: I do that too.
Corey: That's sounds, fair. So I would love to hear you talk about that a little bit. Foraging and scavenging.
Kim: In what way?
Corey: So like, what does that look like for you? What are you looking for?
Kim: If I'm specifically looking for something, then I already know exactly what I'm looking for and I'm just looking for that specific thing. Like if I need bones, then I'll go ride around until I see a roadkill snake. If I am doing a spell and I don't know what I need, then I just go out and wander around (laughs) until it presents itself. And that can look like... uh, it can... I don't even know how to explain it.
Corey: Is it just like a gut feeling, or...
Kim: Well I'll just be thinking about what I need. Okay let's... This is a very basic presentation of it. Let's say I'm doing a protection spell. I'll go outside, because I know there are cacti out there and cholla. But if I decide that I want something else, then... I'm imagining walking through my yard and things that get on my nerves. There are these little tiny flowers, they're called like needle bush or something like that. I don't remember what they're called. It's some kind of little tiny fleabane, might be called desert fleabane, but it has another name because of how irritating it is. And I will find myself being really irritated because they'll get in my shoes and it hurts and then I'll think, oh, I could use that. Or if I, let's say if I was on a, at Anahata's and I did the class that I wanted to do there and I'm wandering through the woods and I come across honeysuckle. There are so many different, even if I don't know that I want to do a spell, if I am just sort of wandering around thinking "I need to do something because I feel like I need to do some magic." And I'll wander through. If I found honeysuckle, then binding is something I would use it for, or sweetening or nostalgia, like a feeling of familiarity at home. Does that answer the question?
Corey: Yeah, I think so.
Kim: Okay, good.
Corey: Which also brings me to another topic because as an Appalachian, I know that Appalachia feels very specific. Like you and I have talked about that a couple of times. What is it like to transition, or even if you did transition, I don't know how much you practiced when you lived in this area, but what is it like to transition from magic in Appalachia to... let's say magic in Arizona?
Kim: Um, honestly, it's kind of the same. It's just that I'm picking up different materials. Because back home, I would just wander around, think "I need to, I need something that makes somebody hurt. I need something that heals, or I need something for protection. I need something to make somebody smile." And I'll wander around until I see it. And I can do that anywhere, but I feel like that's a specifically Appalachian thing in my opinion because if you ain't got a lot, you do what you can with what you have.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: And I feel like that's something that comes from that area.
Corey: Yeah I would agree with that. I also think that like energy is very different, too, between like Appalachia and literally everywhere else.
Kim: Oh yeah it is. That is very different.
Corey: Yeah like you going outside and getting rain means that you're getting like...
Kim: Life.
Corey: Yeah like you actually watch everything bloom. Which I'm a little jealous of. But then the like, old thrum of energy that Appalachia has...
Kim: Yes.
Corey: Like that's so specific.
Kim: Yep. And I, I remember, I remember being, I was hanging out with my friend Danny, and we were on the Blue Ridge Parkway, and there's this one specific spot that is amazing. And I remember feeling like if I knew the right words, that a portal would open, and I was so frustrated because I didn't know what the words were. I don't get that here in the same way. Here it's a lot, and I've said it before, it's so much younger and more fierce and wild and awake.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: And back home... it's still powerful as hell but it's more somnolent.
Corey: Ooh, good word.
Kim: Isn't it? Isn't it?
Corey: Look at you. That's one you can sink your teeth into. Yeah, I get that. Anytime I've gone to like Dallas, and I will be coming to Arizona for the Gem show, I and I feel like it's probably gonna feel the same as it or similarly to as it does in Dallas but it's always this like everything feels like it could change at the drop of a dime But also, because of that, nothing is set in stone. So everything is constantly changing. And there's, like you said, a wildness about that, which is crazy.
Kim: Everything here wants to kill you.
Corey: Fair.
Kim: And it feels like that. It feels like an adventure just to be alive in this area. And like I'm challenging nature every second. Back home, there are, I know that I'm fully aware that I could die back home too, and that if I'm not careful, things can hurt me, but it's just more subtle.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: It's kind of like a genteel old southern lady versus some young upstart and if the upstart wants to insult you she'll probably just say something shitty to you. And then it's done. But if the old genteel lady wants to do it it'll be so subtle that you won't even realize that she was talking shit about you until like the next day, And you're like, "Oh that bitch!" That's how I feel about Appalachia.
Corey: Appalachia's old money. (both laugh)
Kim: Yes! Those are all negative. I don't mean to sound like I think either place is bad.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: That's just where my brain went right now. Sorry. I love both places.
Corey: Imagery, yay! If you are comfortable, would you like to share a ritual or spell of some sort from your practice?
Kim: Hmmm.
Corey: Because we were talking about protection magic earlier. I'm just going to go down and looking for it.
Kim: (pauses) I'll tell you something that I did in the past. So, Ken was deployed to Afghanistan, And their local police chief, the locals didn't love him because he was working with the Americans. And so when they handed Afghanistan back to the Taliban, essentially, he had a price on his head. And he was in hiding and so everybody back home, back here, everybody in the unit plus everybody I could scrounge up to do any sort of energy work or fundraise, was working to bring him home. And so one of the spells I did was to conceal him, but also harass the shit out of any Taliban who were actively looking for him. And so I printed off a picture of him, and then I put it in a jar, and I put foil around the jar, and I put in like sweetening things like honey and I have honeysuckle and red clover and things that were comfortable in there. And so on the outside I put hot peppers and thorns and tarantula hair, and just, things that were going to repel. And asafoetida, I used that.
And then in another one, I printed a picture of a bunch of people who on websites were Taliban, I don't know how to say that. And I rolled them up and I got cat shit, dog shit, any kind of shit that I could find. There's rat shit outside, all of it. And I squished it together. I made this little ball and there was like hot peppers in it, and salt, and black pepper, just things that... I think I might have put some actual acid in it that I have because I do metal work and I have random shit laying around, like metal shavings, and I had a glove on when I was doing all of that so I pulled the glove off and all that stuff is inside, you know how you de- so and I tied it up and I wrapped it in wire and I have wire shoving into it. And then I put that in a mirrored box and I just said this, every time they think of him, every time they try to look for him. Oh, and I think I peed into onto it. Oh, and I put pork in it. Just everything that would be terrible. Because they're Muslim.
Corey: Oh, okay. That makes sense.
Kim: So every time they thought of him or were close to him or anything to do with him, that's what they would inter- That's what they would get.
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: And eventually we did get him and his family over here. So he's safe. He and his family are safe over here. And I hope one day that we can meet him because he's actually very important in, he played a huge part in rescuing Chuck, our dog from Afghanistan because Ken technically was not supposed to rescue a dog and he got in a lot of trouble with his chain of command for doing it. And he had to get the dog from the base where they were, to Kabul. He had to get him there so they could fly him out. And it's not like Ken can fucking take a Humvee and just go for a ride. It's that, they're at war. And so this guy drove the dog to Kabul and back. I mean, he drove the dog there. And so I'm very thankful, and I want to thank him for that personally.
Corey: What if he listens to the podcast? How wild would that be?
Kim: That would be really weird because I'm pretty sure that he is also Muslim.
Corey: Well, yeah, that makes sense. That's fair. (laughs)
Kim: And I don't know that he speaks enough English to get all the weird bullshit we talk about.
Corey: Oh, fair. Yeah. I just want it to be mainstream. I want everyone to talk about witchy stuff all the time.
Kim: Me too.
Corey: If you had a message, and I will let you pick one, this one. It can be yourself or it can be another person who's newly practicing. If you had one lesson that you could like instantly impart on to either younger you, or a person who's newly to the craft, what lesson would that be?
Kim: Don't worry about the rule of three, the law of three, whatever that Wiccan thing is? Don't worry about that.
Corey: (laughs) Okay.
Kim: It's fine. Do the curse. It's fine. Repercussions do happen, but it's probably not going to come back to you times three because this is not Charmed, and I'm not Wiccan. Though if I was Wiccan it would be different. If you're Wiccan take what I say with a grain of salt, because it might apply to you. It depends on your beliefs, but stop. Stop with the three. It's not going to come back to me times three.
Corey: Also, like something that I think is interesting in that is, like, the way I see magic, and this is me interjecting as Corey. The way I see magic is like you you're petitioning the universe to do something about someone or something. If the universe decides to pick up that message, cool.
Kim: Exactly.
Corey: If it doesn't, it doesn't. I hate to tell ya, but sometimes you can be a shithead too.
Kim: Ya ain't that important. (laughs)
Corey: Sometimes sometimes people may need to petition the universe because of something you did. That's okay. Learn your lessons, try your best to be a good person, and you move on.
Kim: That's the main thing, just try to be a good person. I actually, If I'm going to curse someone, and I'm making finger quotes, I usually just ask the universe to give them what they deserve. Because I honestly don't know that person's life. Maybe they do deserve better treatment than I'm wishing on them. So it's not my place to do that. Maybe I don't know the whole story.
Corey: Right. Karma spells could go both ways.
Kim: Yep.
Corey: So, tell us about your drink that you're drinking.
Kim: My drink?
Corey: Yeah.
Kim: It is delicious well water, in which I have ice cubes made from delicious well water. And then I took half a pack of Jolly Rancher watermelon drink mix and half a pack of Great Value lemonade drink mix and I threw it in there and stirred it up and it's delicious. However, if you have a Target near you and you go to their drink mix section, there is a variety pack by Market Pantry, which I think is Target's brand. It has strawberry lemonade, regular lemon lemonade, and watermelon lemonade. And that watermelon lemonade is AMAZING. But it only comes in the multi-pack, and I don't like strawberry lemonade, and I don't need lemon lemonade. I only want the watermelon, and I don't make it. And so this is a shadow of how good that is.
Corey: So if you're listening to the podcast and you're going to Anahata's Purpose...
Kim: Oh my god. Bring me watermelon lemonade, Market Pantry watermelon lemonade packets. Yes. Unlike last year when a bunch of people bought me Cheerwine, which I appreciated and it's so kind. I will lose my shit if a bunch of people bring me that watermelon lemonade from Market Pantry. But only that kind, because there's also one by True Lemon, I think, that is not even mediocre. It is miserable. It tastes like the LaCroix version of drink mixes. It's bad.
Corey: No.
Kim: Don't drink that.
Corey: No thank you, no, thank you. All right, we're getting to some of the last questions.
Kim: Okey-doke.
Corey: And this is all about food.
Kim: Ooh! (laughs gleefully)
Corey: So, as someone who is, like, desperately hungry, this is going to be, like, a lot of vocal sounds. I apologize. Because you're going to be like, oh, yeah, oh, god. (laughs)
Kim: Okay, here we go. Yayyyyy! Whoever did this, I love you so much. (both laugh)
Corey: If you could manifest any food in front of you right now, what would it be?
Kim: A big ass rib eye and a giant baked potato with extra butter, extra sour cream, and a bunch of fresh ground black pepper, and the focaccia from Poor Richard's, the center piece, because I don't like edges. And probably my salad that I make.
Corey: But you didn't have to make that one, because that ruins the purpose.
Kim: Okay.
Corey: It's magic. Magic works best.
Kim: But I want the Poor Richard's salad dressing on it. Ooh, with jicama and sugar snaps. Poor Richards is a wonderful restaurant in Colorado Springs. I love it. It's also a bookstore. It's also a toy store. It's also... It's so cool. Bro, it is so cool. It's a pizza place. It is a wine bar... Richard, I don't remember his last name, but he owns this strip of buildings downtown and it's all these cool little indie bookstore, used bookstore, amazing, kind of left leaning, not even kind of ,pretty left-leaning. I love it so much. I love Poor Richards. It's one of the things I miss the most. But also, the Ethiopian place in Colorado Springs is run by the most beautiful woman in the world, Maya Hetman, whom I love. Her chicken tibs, the miser wat and her salads are so good. Oh my god. And the rosewater lemonade and her flourless chocolate cake. Oh my god. But also, my granddad, who is no longer with us. He used to marinate a gigantic... London broil, I think. He would marinate it in teriyaki sauce that he made. That was so amazing. And I'll never have that again, because he's gone. But also, a little side memory that has nothing to do with what we're talking about, I asked for that from my birthday once when I was probably like 11. And mom also made my cake, but she marinated the steak next to the cake overnight. (laughing)
Corey: Oh no.
Kim: So the cake tasted like teriyaki. (both laugh) It was so not good. Oh my god, that brings me to another weird story. It's a story time. Are you ready?
Corey: Yeah, let's go. Let's do it.
Kim: So my sweet, sweet, beloved cat, named Catcat, passed away right before Ken and I got married and it was a combination of not being able to afford to have him cremated by himself so I could get the ashes back, and also I couldn't bear to part with him, and so we put him in the freezer. Where we also put the top layer of our wedding cake, because you know, you save that. A year later I was ready to have him cremated and when I got him out he smelled like that wedding cake. And so we threw away everything in the freezer. (laughs)
Corey: (laughs) I was really concerned where that story was going. I thought it was gonna be the exact opposite scenario. I thought it was gonna be like...
Nope
Corey: I thought it was gonna be like "rio well we were ready to have our like year anniversary cake and we pulled it out..."
Kim: Nope. We pulled him out first, happily Oh Catcat.
Corey: I love that you had at cat named Catcat. "What's his first name? Cat. What's his last name? ...Cat."
Kim: So it's just named Cat? No, it's Catcat.
Corey: Do you want people to send you pictures of food all the time?
Kim: Yes!! Oh, my God. When everybody went to the Jim and Jupe Tour and people were sending me Marcos of their meals, my heart grew 47 sizes bigger. That is my favorite thing. If you have something that you love to eat and it just fills your heart with joy and you think of it, take a picture of it, and send it to me on Instagram or email it to me. That makes my LIFE. My niece recently, for the first time in her life, she's like, I don't know, 20-something now, she sent me a picture of the food she was eating and I freaked out and all-capsed her. "I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!" and she said, I know that's why I did it. But I don't remember ever telling her that I love that. (both laugh) But anyway, yeah, if you I will love you so much if you send me pictures of your food, because I fucking love food.
Corey: The way to Kim's heart: food. Direct. Also, it probably helps that every time someone's like, oh, I'm going somewhere, the first thing that you say is, send me pictures of all your food.
Kim: Or "Go here. If I've been there, this is where you need to eat."
Corey: You gave me like, you gave me a chore list of places to go in Philadelphia. It was great. But it also like, it removed all of the guesswork. I was like, listen, this is where Kim wants me to go. I got to go.
Kim: Did you go to Primanti Brothers? I really want to go there.
Corey: I don't think so. What is their thing? Remind me.
Kim: French fries on their giant sandwiches.
Corey: No, we did not go there.
Kim: (whispers) I really want to go there.
Corey: We did...
Kim: I know you went to Federal Donuts. I know you went there.
Corey: We didn't go there.
Kim: I'm so envious.
Corey: The donuts were there for us.
Kim: Oh.
Corey: Which they were...
Kim: I'm envious.
Corey: So good.
Kim: They were out of donuts when Margo and I and Kacie went there. And they had this chicken sandwich that sounded amazing on their website. And they didn't have anything. We went there and my heart just crumbled.
Corey: Just nothing. It was dust. There was no more. All of your heart went with the food.
Kim: It, like, collapsed on itself like a neutron star. Is a neutron star that does that?
Corey: It's one of the stars. I don't know. I haven't been in the eight grade...
Kim: Any way that one.
Corey: Astrology, astronomy, that study of the stars.
Kim: Either one.
Corey: That's it, though. That's all the questions. Oh, I can pull more out of my butt if you want me to.
Kim: If you want to, you can't, but you don't have to.
Corey: I love talking to you Kim what are you talking about? I can always ask you more questions.
Kim: I was gonna turn the recording off and we're just gonna talk about the shit we need to talk about. (both laugh)
Corey: We can do that too, I'm okay with that. I just love talking to you.
Kim: I miss you so much!
Corey: I miss you. We're gonna have a new podcast called (censor beep sound) The intro is just going to be us like fighting over who gets to make that episode. (both laugh) Could you imagine?
Kim: Oh, I'm not going to do this until I buy the domain, by the way. I am buying the domain, but I'm not going to publicize the name until we actually, until I buy it.
Corey: That's fair.
Kim: Okay.
Corey: Okay.
Kim: Are we going to close out somehow? Just the end of the podcast is... (laughs)
Corey: Listen, it was a cold open, it's a cold close. Let's go.
Kim: Okay. (laughing)
Corey: This is a freezer door, people. Bye.
Kim: The end.
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